Earlier this month, Inspiyr featured an article entitled “Your Mother was Right: Sit Down, Don’t Slouch, for Long Term Health.” As most of our readers must surely agree, the tagline is fitting; it’s one of the famous mottos of the modern mom, ranking up with favorites like “Eat Your Vegetables,” “Wash Your Hands before You Eat,” and for those not-so-well-adjusted families, “Where Did I Go Wrong?” Valuable advice, to be sure, but the title may have stirred up some unpleasant memories – you probably greeted this sort of comment with a little resentment.
Maybe you felt that your parents didn’t trust you enough to let you solve your own problems and learn from your mistakes – or maybe you were just being difficult (what if I want bad posture, damn it!) Most children learn to cope, seeing their parents’ good intentions and reminding themselves that they’ll be treated as adults someday.
No doubt they’re startled when they grow up and realize that almost nothing has changed. Mom is complaining that you haven’t found another job (and yet you still can’t find the time to call her); Dad can’t believe how high the rent is on that horrible apartment.
The Parent-Child Bond
The bond between parents and children is, in the words of Medical News Today, “one of the longest lasting social ties human beings establish… [it] is often highly positive and supportive but it also commonly includes feeling of irritation, tension, and ambivalence.3” Most parents and children care deeply for one another and consider their relationship to be one of their most important roles in life. Just as often, however, this relationship can be stressful and highly demanding.
Parents spend much of their time, money and energy to keep their children healthy and happy, only to find their efforts repaid with hostility and gratuitous eye-rolling. In direct contrast, children are “driven by curiosity, wanting to learn and explore the world and themselves in the world.1” Even as we grow and mature, our relationship with our parents remains largely the same – they hope to give us comfort and safety, while we hope to gain freedom and experience.
What Is Parental Divorce?
As times passes, our parents watch us take on a multitude of new responsibilities, which often include