When we’re single but don’t want to be, it’s natural to wonder if we’ll ever meet the right partner. However, getting into a successful relationship is not all that different from achieving any other dream, such as reaching a financial goal or launching a lucrative, satisfying business.
Based on some of the techniques I and others have used to launch successful startups, here are five strategies for attracting a perfect partner.
1. See yourself as you’d like to be seen
Typically, there are three views that influence how we feel about ourselves–and hence, how we project ourselves to the world: how we see ourselves, how we think others see us, and how others actually see us. All that matters is who you truly are and how you view yourself. It is imperative not to allow the other two images to color how you think and feel about yourself. If you don’t enable self-love and self-appreciation to be stronger than the opinions of others, then outside critics and judgers can chip away at your confidence and positive self-image. Poor self-image repels rather than attracts.
2. Write your own commercials
The media bombards us with images that can truly be confusing–from the “perfect” airbrushed bodies in magazines and the lewd behavior of reality TV stars, to endless products and commercials that purport to make us thinner, happier, and sexier. When we listen to and absorb all these media messages, it can diminish our opinion of ourselves and even shape our behavior. If you feel genuinely good about who you are, you will exude the confidence that attracts others. If you feel insecure because you’ve just wasted an hour of your life watching a show about body makeovers, your energy will be negative and off-putting to potential partners.
3. Stop fighting loneliness
We can spend so much time and energy warding off loneliness and fighting against the frustration of feeling stuck that those combative thoughts begin to form a pattern in our brain, like an old-fashioned vinyl record with the needle going round and round the same grooves. Neuroscientists have shown that thoughts really do generate moods and energies. If your thoughts are negative, your energy will be sluggish. Stop being against loneliness and instead be for a satisfying relationship. Accept the current situation for what it is: a little time and space to start over. Then make ...
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